I have this thing I say when people do the socially obligatory thing and say, “How ya doing?”.

Every time someone asks me how I am, I smile and tell them, "Happy and blessed."

It has become a mantra for me and at the same time, while it wasn’t always the case in my mind, I now say it because it's become true.

A while ago I was at the post office and the woman behind the counter was going about her duties, seemingly oblivious to the people she was meeting. She didn't look up when I walked over but said, “Hi. How are you? Can I help you?” in that flat, obligatory way we've all done a hundred times. Half present. Just moving through the day.

And I said it. I did my usual, “Happy and blessed!” thing.

Something in my tone made her look up. She gave me this huge smile, her shoulders softened, and we connected for a minute. I told her the truth of it, which is so simple it almost sounds silly.

I've been happy and I've been sad and, well... happy is better! I get to choose every single day, so I choose to be happy.

As I walked away, I heard her greet the man in line behind me, "Did you hear what that lady said? Isn't that great?"

That was the whole thing. A small, simple exchange but it changed the temperature of the entire room. And it costs you absolutely nothing.

Sometimes people think "happy and blessed" is just a cheerful little phrase. A nice thing to toss out at the post office or at the coffee shop.

It's not.

It's the result of something I actually practice, and it took me years to understand the difference.

Happy and blessed isn't a feeling that shows up on its own. It's not waiting for the good day, the good news, or the thing finally going your way. If I waited for circumstances to give me that feeling, I'd be waiting a long time, same as anyone.

Instead, I’ve trained myself to start with what's already true.

I woke up this morning. I have a body that carried me out of bed. There's a Nespresso on the counter, electricity to run it, and a plethora of coffee pod options. There's work I care about and people that I love.

None of that is small, even though most of us take it for granted every single day.

So much of what we're chasing—happiness, peace of mind, a sense of purpose and meaning—is already all around us just waiting to be recognized. We simply have to notice.

I used to think I had to feel good before I could make things happen. But I had it backwards. The commitment comes first, and the feeling follows it.

When I say, "I'm happy and blessed" out loud with real warmth, my own body believes it a little more each time. I am training the pathways in my brain to recognize what is already good and true.

The story you are telling yourself becomes the life that you are living.

So take heed.

The fastest way back to joy is handing a piece of it to someone else.

That woman at the post office got my warmth, and I walked away with more than I came in with. I walked away knowing that, at least for a moment, I had changed someone's day.

That feeling multiplies.

It always does.

Happy and blessed is a muscle that gets built in the ordinary moments so it's there for you in the hard ones.

I woke up this morning.

That's where it starts.

And from there, it multiplies in the small, simple, precious moments that fill our days.

Today, I am happy and blessed.

And chances are, if you're reading this, you have plenty of reasons to be, too.